May 11, 2018

Horsefly







Dr. Jenkins received his grant money with specific instruction: Make a horsefly. I think what they meant was "make the horse that flies".

cp

Apr 20, 2018

Beach Fly

Beach fly is a variant of the bar fly, and like this cartoon, it is cheap, quick, and easy. I'm on vacation this week.

Cheers, motherfuckers!

cp

Apr 13, 2018

Snack Check


TSA is conducting snack checks now. Snack checks. Like hockey checks, but they rattle a snack loose and eat it.

"Let me see your snacks, sir! I LIKE THAT KIND...it can't fly!" *CHOMP!*

I recognize that these front-line pervs are doing someone else's bidding, but the whole lot of them are contemptible shits, so no breaks. And as foul as they are between you and the airplanes, you should see them at the end of a shift. The same people who just spent eight hours keeping you in line while sniffing your shorts and feeling up your kids, drive like they're on the final lap at Talladega in a fucking rental car. No kindness. No courtesy. Just aggressive, boorish assholes jockeying for an inch that might be yours. Despicable shits!

You know, there's another division of TSA that just goes around levying fines against airport tenants and airline employees. It's true. Every time there is a lapse in security or a breech in the system somewhere on the airfield (irregardless of whose lapse it was, but usually their own), the TSA starts pestering the shit out of tenants and employees at the airport. Seriously despicable, contemptible shits.

...anyway, they're taking snacks from passengers now.



Don't worry, shit-eater. You're back on next week.

cp

Apr 6, 2018

Specs

Well, well. Here comes ole 4002 eyes...

Margot cautiously enters the halls of ridicule wearing her new specs.
cp

Mar 30, 2018

Identity Crisis


I wonder which bathroom the June bugs are going to make Lester use.

cp

Mar 23, 2018

Porning

I think in one of the instances where I walked in on this situation, the panicked response was, "AAAHHH! PORNING!!" I stepped out before I saw anything and stood there, stunned by a profound realization: porning is a verb. 

What does it mean "to porn"?

cp


Mar 16, 2018

Fly

The idea of a fly flying, at least in this fashion, is fucking ridiculous.

I used the acrylic brushes I downloaded a couple of weeks ago.  I don't know that they serve cartoons very well.

cp

Acrylic Brush Set

I use Autodesk Sketchbook for this trivial, audience-free shit. One of the benefits of being a subscriber to Sketchbook is the availability of free brush sets. Last week I downloaded the acrylic brush set. Acrylics are my weapon of choice when I'm not wielding my stylus. These e-brushes, remarkably, mimic the strokes of (cheap) brushes loaded with acrylic paint--but not entirely or exactly. The touch, shape, and finess of an actual brush is still far superior. But this ain't bad. But it ain't good, either.

cp