Jun 22, 2018

Strike


Based on actual events.
That actually happened.
In my house.
This week.

cp

Jun 14, 2018

Period



Alternate responses:
  • I've eaten worse.
  • Well can I sniff it a bit?
  • It's not your fault. It's not your fault.
  • I'm Batman. 
  • "HEEEEEY, DON'T LET IT GO TO WASTE! I LOVE IT BUT I HATE THE TASTE!"
cp

Jun 7, 2018

Persistence


The persistence with which a fly will bang its ugly head against a closed window leaves little doubt as to why biology dictates it must have a jillion maggots per litter.

cp

Jun 1, 2018

Keto


I heard someone say, "Man, this keto diet sucks. I can't eat shit."
Who knew? Sneaky carbs. Hiding everywhere. 

cp